Battle Royale – by Alan Arthur King

Session 6 January 2022

Participants: 
Zeph Glitterfitter
Lorraine
Ignis Spark
Crewial
Anki Laine
Tamir Code/Decimator
Periwinkle
Mevin
Daralei
Aedan Rhogar
Jesus
Alan Arthur King

A large group of fighters makes its way to the fighting pit. I’ve asked Myrddin to come along, but he is not feeling well, so he will watch from a distance. In the common backstage area, we all get an amulet of wound closure and we’re put into little private rooms to get ready for the fight. I breathe in, and out. I whisper to Legbiter: “Let’s go and have some fun! Those bastards won’t even see us coming! We’ve battled so much in the past fifteen years, a couple of melee knights and fighters are a piece of cake!” As the doors open, I see a big globe, with within it, a big arena. A lizard-looking gentleman welcomes us. “Welcome to the arena! Welcome! Welcome! I’ll show you around!”
The lizard-man is flying. I’ve never seen that shit before. I’m not really familiar with magic, except for my own. I shake off my surprise and pay attention to his presentation.

“There are some walls places around the entire arena. If you exit the fighting area, you’re disqualified. Firstly, I’m standing on a plateau in the center of the pit. If you need some extra strength, you can come here. But beware, there are some risks here. The middle is nice, but you’re also a nice target for others. This plateau is surrounded by water and we have two bridges taking you to the mainland. The pond is 15 feet deep. The fall doesn’t hurt that much, but it takes quite some time to get out.” He flies over a couple of pits scattered around the arena. “These are spike pits. You can walk around them and try to push other people in. It is pretty painful. These walls with nails in them are quite nasty too, just like the flamethrowers, spears, and swords sticking out of the outer walls. Of course, you can avoid it all, but you’ll have to pay attention to where you walk. To finish off: we also have four pillars placed around the arena. There are little holes in them, where pressure is building up. If you hear a whistling sound, you should get out of there – the pillars will explode soon. These are the rules: battle each other but don’t kill. In the first couple of seconds, you’re not allowed to attack. Stay in the ring, if you leave, you’ll be disqualified. Killing or being inactive will also result in disqualification.” He turns towards us. The globe is getting bigger and bigger, and like transportation, I find myself standing in the ring. The last words I hear before the battle begins are: “Jesus, the previous winner is also competing. Let the battle begin!”

Jesus, the champion


I channel my inner powers and turn my attention to Legbiter. I immediately feel more powerful. I walk to the platform and see a fairy floating in the air. That’ll be my first target, I think to myself. The fairy seems very squishy and doesn’t have large weapons at all, so that must be easy. However, before I can lift my javelin to throw it at the fairy, I get distracted by a fiery bird. What in the nine hells is this thing?

BLAAAM! One of the pillars explodes. It is not near but throws me off my game for a second. I turn around to find the source of the ruckus. Then. As in a slow-motion, I see my next target. It is without a doubt the previous winner Jesus. I don’t pay attention to the fairy anymore, it has flown out of reach. If I want to be victorious and make a name for myself at the Guild, I’ll have to take him out. No matter the costs. I see a rogue sneaking up on him and I decide to go and help her. She is doing a lot of damage to him. That is nice, she is already making my job easier. Stupid girl, the hard work must be done by men. Men like me.

The hard reality hits me and stops my contemplation about the fight ahead. Jesus hits the woman, she is launched from the place she’s s standing and does not get up. I now see a chance to attack him. From a distance, I throw my javelin at him but miss. That is unfortunate. Instead, I run at Jesus, who is fighting a Satyr at the moment, and slam him with my Legbiter. “SMITE” I yell as my mighty longsword slashes him in the back. I pick up my javelin and wait for his reaction. The Satyr is suddenly transported by the fiery bird. That is odd, but I see Jesus dying. That MUST be my doing! I did that! My sword and the wounds it created are the reason Jesus is bleeding to death! I am great. I am awesome. My happiness doesn’t last long. I hear whistling coming from the pillar I’m standing next to. I hastily step over the big, fat legs and run away. In the center, I see a local snowstorm. I’ve never seen anything like that. How come the weather is suddenly located around the center of this arena? I’m glad I’m not in it because I am used to warm and nice castles. On my left, I see a Harengon. Ding, ding, that is my next target. I attack her. She returns the favor with a lot of fire. Oh shit, she has magic. I’ve never come across foes with magic on my crusades, so this is NEW. Luckily, she shoots off. I try to hit her when she leaves, but she is quick and limber. Another creature shoots an arrow at me, and the Harengon slips through my fingers as I’m avoiding the attack.
The Harengon is still within reach, and behind her, I see an angel-looking guy floating in the air. “I’m not dying yet!” I say to myself, and bring myself up to throw my javelin at the Harengon. She reacts with more fire, and even the fiery bird flies over to attack me. Luckily, I can avoid that one. I am BARELY standing and attempting to heal myself with the power of Legbiter, but I see the angel throwing something at me. Suddenly, I turn cold from an ice shard that hits me right in my chest. I fall over…

When I wake, Myrddin is standing next to me. I am lying in the private room away from the arena. He tells me I did a great job, but that I’m not used to battling magical creatures. Myrddin already saw a great deal of magic in that arena and thought I would have a hard time. In the top five, there were two barbarians (Decimator and Aedan), the Satyr Periwinkle, the angel – “actually, an Aasimar” Says Myrddin – Crewial, and the fairy Zeph. All of them are a force to be reckoned with, but eventually, the top three is as follows:

  1. Aedan Rhogar
  2. Tamir Code/the Decimator
  3. Periwinkle

The Harengon I attacked is named Lorraine and died shortly after I did. I know she was more powerful than me, the others are too. This is exciting.
I sit up straight. I slap Myrddin on his back and exclaim: “That was a great battle. I’m glad you brought me to Heroes Roost!”

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